Let's Hit the Mall....Denim Fever

The kids got back on the bus last week for yet another year of books and learnin'. The weather is still delightful but along with the sounds of the bus braking at the corner I get a sense of the pending weather change. My mind turns to the mall and shopping for some new duds! What connotes a relaxed and stressfree attitude more than some new denim for fall! Everyone loves denim. I've been a jeans gal all my life. I was built for them before they were $200 a pair custom designer duds. I was a Levis girl and today I'm an almost anything goes girl! Still love my jeans! While visiting the website of one of my favorite magazines not long ago, www.more.com, I found a great article chock full of ideas that I thought I'd pass along to you. It pertains to just this little fall project, denim shopping. There were many wonderful options for women, specifically selected for forty plus. Now, if you're not yet there, that's ok, these styles are not your grammies jeans; no offense to mailorder. These styles are to die for!My favs have to be one pair that I already own, the J. Crew Boyfriends @ $108! So comfy and cool looking. CJ by Cookie Johnson at $196 are cropped and cuffed for dressing up or down and terrific for right now. For some bargains you can't ignore in your wardrobe Old Navy offers quite a selection this fall, as does Gap, in every cut and style you can imagine. Featured in this layout were a pair of Old Navy drawstring. A little too retro for you? That's ok, but I think everyone needs one pair of "let it be" jeans for those particular days when you just can't bear to be all tucked in! Let's face it we all have them. We will at times become victims to fashion instead of succumbing to comfort. These are for those days when we just can't any longer...and so cool! Gap's Boyfriend jeans will do the same thing; relaxed, slouchy but a little more definition. I own both! Tory Burch offers a really sharp pair of wide legs for dressing it up with platform pumps and probably would meet the requirements of Friday dressdown to after hour work days. So chic! Of course, there's always the trendsetters such as David Kahn, Paige Premium Denim, 7 for All Mankind, Rock n' Republic and the like. Joe Jeans have a style and shape to fit every figure with cute sassy monikers and you can't go wrong with Not Your Mother's Jeans if you happen to be trying to widen the gap between your closet and your teenagers'! So happy shopping; just remember to take a couple things with you, a good attitude and a large bottle of water, jean shopping is a marathon when you have such vast selections! Thanks for reading! Miriam

Please vote for EDC on Divine Caroline!

Hi Friends of EDC! Thank you for visiting here at my blog, my little part of the cyberworld...and thank you for reading! I hope that what inspires me inspires you too! I am also hoping that you like what you read and that you will vote for my website, Equilibrium Design and Consulting, and this blog, for the 2009 DivineCaroline Love This Site Award. Please click on the Badge for Divine Caroline to the left and vote often! Or visit the site, vote and read about many other sites and stories! Contest ends December 4th! Thank you for helping me put my business and my thoughts out there, I love what I do! Creatively yours, Miriam

How I Got Beyond the Rain

Well, we set out once more for a last hurrah a week or so ago, a nice quiet relaxing week at the beach with family and some friends; something we always look forward to; the familiar, the rest, the reconnections. We usually want the beach experience to be perfection because if it's not, what else is there to do! I do not go to the beach to watch Netflix! Well, what happens when it's not perfection? Can we easily put aside any disruptions and missteps in our plans? Sometimes I do better than other times. I think I have finally learned to put the fluctuating weather patterns in someone else's hands, as much as I love the warmth and sunshine. I no longer look ahead to our destination for weather because there is not a darned thing I can do to change it. I pack accordingly, for all elements and hope for the best climate the surroundings can offer us on our journey. If I anticipate disaster, does it help me to accept it better? Not really! So, while I might whisper my little "come on sunshine" mantra at the start of our week, I let it be. Then I can be oh so pleased when it's a perfect sunkissed day. This said you'd think, well, what else is there then? How about Hurricane Bill with it's whipping winds and rain, two guests who had to cancel visits after I had shopped accordingly, being covered in a horrible case of poison ivy, among only a couple of unexpected setbacks. When things like this occur I try to run a loop of that sometimes annoying little jingle from Monty Python that John DiBella has adapted as his mantra, "Always look on the bright side of life!" Ba....humbug, I say. But really, once the storm passed, so to speak, I had adjusted to the demands made on me and my family due to weather, sickness, cancellations and it really wasn't that bad. After I was once again feeling more like myself after being loaded up with heavy medications, creams and potions, I was able to get over that hump in the road and the sun did shine. Beautifully! The best of the best was a phone call from a friend back home that let us know things would move ahead in a positive way! My youngest, for his last year in elementary school, got the teacher of his dreams! Nothing can spoil that! We will return home and life will be good, rain, shine, broken bones and all! Thanks for reading! Miriam

Friendships Missed

Well, we did it again! We let another entire year pass before we were able to commit to a date with some wonderful, old friends from days gone by. Old as in, yes, we were together to celebrate my husbands' advanced age (jk Joe!)...and old in that the older we get the older the friendships become. This is a wonderful thing. While these friendships are formed because we trudged to class together and commiserated about our college professors, or shared a cubicle at our first job, these friendships last because we see something special in our friends and want them in our lives. Sometimes other things prevent us from keeping the lines of communication constant and the get togethers frequent. Sometimes it's distance, sometimes it's work, sometimes it's children and their hectic little lives. But one thing's for sure, time seems to have stood still when we get together...finally...after that long year of trying and waiting! It's so familiar, so comfortable and so wonderful we ask ourselves, how do we let this happen? How do we manage to let the year grow into 2, 3, 5...more? How does a dear, wonderful friend leave this world and our lives before we find the time? How do we even stand ourselves for allowing this to happen? We don't intend for it to happen, but it can...and it does. I know we all are guilty of it. But before we know it we're old. Yes, here we are. Not really THAT old, but certainly feeling it when we sit together over dinner and multiple glasses of wine and look at the children who in those 365 days can change so dramatically. We wonder where the time goes. And when we reminisce together and laugh until we cry, we wonder where the time goes? And then we loose one of us far too soon and we regret the time we lost. This is the kick in the pants I know I needed to get me to think quick and realize that I can not let this happen again. It prompted me to call one of my dearest (she'd kill me if I said oldest!) friends, a confidante in thought and deed...whom I haven't seen in 2 1/2 yrs! I invite her to join us on our vacation for a while because I just can't let another day go by. Why don't you pick up the phone today, or if you can't do that, make yourself a short to-do list of people that you miss and one by one be with them. A quick lunch, a cup of coffee and a chat, or if you can a long weekend together. What more joy is there than living, loving and laughing! Thanks for reading! Miriam

All in a Days' Meditation

While nestled amongst the green mountains of Vermont I always feel a sense of inner peace and the power and majesty of something bigger than myself. I have been hoping to introduce meditation into my life for some time, however, I always seem to jeopardize my attempts before I get far enough to call it routine.

This time was different. While on vacation I saw listed an introduction to meditation class and I knew I had to try it out. So glad I did, the instructor was wonderfully inspiringl a world traveler and student of budism, yogis of India and Thailand and a calming presence immediately. I knew she would inspire me and finally I would understand the process. After an hour and a half of conversation, practice and instruction I began to be able to find the calm that many people, including this instructor, have told me would be life changing.

Mind you, I'm a fantastic multitasker, I could easily follow my breath, think about her instructions to the class and also catagorize my "to-do" list! Not the intention, however! I've been doing this since first grade when I'd constantly be reprimanded by my teacher for chatting during class instruction time. "No problem, I heard you, lady!" Still, always found myself at recess spending days upon days walking up and down the parochial school sidewalks as my punishment.

You would think this would have been a good time to practice being alone and focusing my thoughts on one thing at a time. instead, I continued to nurture my multitasking skills and over the years have even shaped my business around this theme.

Time to stop. For me slow my thoughts and my brain, focusing my breath and just "being" is very difficult. We started small and hoped to be successful in five minute incriments; pushing the thoughts away as they fought their way back. Five minutes is a long time in meditation when you are new at the practice. Trust me, it's worth it. I know that it is going to take me many, many weeks of practice to find meditation to be easy, but it is a test of wills and I always enjoy that type of challenge.

I have found some soothing instrumental musical selections and downloaded them onto my ipod. Right now this helps to put me in a more meditative state but eventually I hope to be able to find this place just about any time. I'm proud to say I am finding the minutes are flying by. Five minutes isn't that difficult and ten minutes is more suitable, hoping twenty to thirty will soon follow. Finding the time to sit down is harder but I am really working to make that a priority. The calm and sense of peace that I feel afterwards is evident. When my mind wanders during the day and I begin to feel stressed I let myself think back to my mornings' meditation and redirect the calm. It is a process and a decisive mental practice.

Take some time today for yourself and explore your calm. Thanks for reading! Miriam

Packing to travel can be both cathartic and headache inducing. One thing is a must; be organized. I can't pack any other way. It's not a free-for-all since if we're traveling by plane the weight restrictions for luggage with the overage charges can deplete your margarita reserve before you even leave the tarmac!

I find packing small very difficult because I never know what kind of mood I'm going to be in on any given day, what type of social events I will partake in or if I'll be feeling extra bloated at some point. How do you pack small with that kind of uncertainty?

Of course, once I do determine the clothing items, there's accessories! I could do without the clothes...well, you know what I mean; I buy clothes to go with my great accessories; love my bags, shoes and jewels; and I'm totally half dressed without them.

Stress as I may, I generally do ok. I've learned that when I'm heading to the mountains I certainly don't need Jimmy Choos! If you know you'll have the option of doing laundry, pack for half as many days as you'll be traveling. Lay out your outfits and see how much mixing and matching you can do. Right now the styles are shown in tones like gray, tan, navy and black with bright color accents. Bring along the minimum knowing you can always launder.

Keep in mind, depending on your destination, that there may be a chilly night or two so a versatile jacket or cardigan is a must. One pair of jeans and one long sleeved top for an extra chilly or rainy day needs to be tucked in just in case. Here's the hard part, keep the shoe selection small. Pack the flat sandals and wear the one pair of wedges that you can make work with anything.

Underpinnings and swimsuits can be hand washed and hung to dry so you don't need too much variety here, contrary to what we might see, it's should not be a fashion show at the pool. What I do at this point is then look at everything I've set aside and remove what I really and truly can live without. Then I probably am ready to accessorize. Two handbags, one for day, one for going out, that's it! This is difficult for me, as is packing the shoes. I am still working on great restraint in this regard.

The jewelry accessories can usually be paired down too-another tough job for me. One long strand of beads for a night or two out that can be doubled or layered with shorter strands to give a different look. Add some chunky bangles that can make less look like more and a pair of earrings in each style; dangle, bangle, hoop and stud; that's about it!

If you plan to get some exercise throw in workout gear and sneakers but hey, you're on vacation...so you needn't stress over this if you can't make it fit. Happy travels all! Thanks for reading! Miriam

Wishing I Had Never Left

Upon returning from vacation in a very different part of the country than we live, I find myself having difficulty with re-entry. We had a very therapeutic and relaxing visit to the mountains of Vermont and oh, how I didn't want to return to the hustle bustle of life in a hurry. There is just something so soothing about seeing rolling hill and dale on the green mountainsides; the coolness in the night and the gentle breeze of the day. The sounds around us were usually of kids laughing with friends and having fun. The events of the evening are always wholesome and simple family activities, finishing off our busy days with joy so that we tumbled into our beds exhausted and without a care. Once home there's laundry, picking up the dog from her "staycation" and sorting the mail. Of course, tending to the overgrowth in the yard and catching up on phonecalls. Not long from now we'll be packing up the backpacks again so while I'm re-acclimating to life as usual I'm going to let my memories linger on the sunny Green Mountain days once again. I journal when I'm away because I want to remember it all. It helps to create those family dinnertime conversations where everyone has a different recall of a comical moment years from now when we're all old and gray. I try very hard to create memories for my boys when I plan our summer getaways and I know that on these vacations they create their own fondest of memories too; each cherishing something different. I always hope that when they are grown they will revisit these destinations with their families, or maybe find work and move to an area that holds a special meaning for them. There is so much more to life than our little neck of the woods. I hope they appreciate the differences and what these wonderful experiences offer. Of course, I'll visit often!

Guys and Dolls....We Are Who We Are!

Communicating with the opposite sex is difficult at best, impossible at worst. Finding a guy that I can relate to in my household is like finding Waldo at the Louvre! (needle in a haystack...ok, an overused cliche...but...true!) I have had a small handful of male friends in my lifetime who I really think "get me". That's a great reassurance knowing that I am understood. I know alot about the guys in my house, but do they "get" me? Do they care? I am sure they do in their own discombobulated way...but I don't know sometimes. I have to settle for the presumption that maybe, when I start on a rant that some of it might be absorbed. I guess the black and the white of it probably are, but I see things in such muted tones of the above and I get frustrated when they don't register anything more than a blank quizical stare. Whhhhaaaatt? I really won't know for sure if my messages and life lessons are heard until long after they have grown and go on to shape their identities apart from our family. My girlfriends are so much easier to read. They are happy to have a visitor or they aren't right now. They feel like listening or they'd rather talk. It's going to be a hootin' good time out or we'd better get our tissues and be in for the long haul. Simple. But persist we must. We need to work hard to find methods of reaching out to people who don't really think, process or maybe even have the same daily insights and understandings that we have. This gets more difficult as the days pass for me. I have one tween, one young teen and a young adult in my home...oh yes, and the hubby, he counts also because he too is missing an integral communication chromosome. Oops! I guess I've learned that while we think differently, I don't have to expect them to think exactly like me, I just wish for them to know why I am feeling strongly about my convictions. I want to know that they will grow up, marry and have a sympathetic ear and a strong shoulder for their wives and not shake their heads and walk away. That's why I just keep talking and hoping. Am I doing it right? Time will tell. I do know that I have an exciting, funny, cerebral and energetic household and there is never a dull moment and I never know what to expect from one day to the next. At least I know they're alive and livin' large. I must be doing something right so I'll just keep on communicating! Thanks for reading...and thanks too for all of your terrific feedback! Miriam

Find Your Own Inspirations

I was at the beach a week or so ago, on one of the most glorious days of the summer. Warm but not sweltering temperatures, a gentle breeze and a glowing sun. I decided to take a walk along the surf and took my camera along just in case I was inspired. What I found was more than inspiration, it was a genuine connection with life and the simplicity of happiness. As I was focusing my lense on the crashing waves against the dark jetty rocks I realized just how spectacular and authentic the natural beauty is around us. Things that we see every day, day in and day out. How many times each twenty-four hours do those waves crash upon those same boulders? The curl of the foam curls in a different shape with each impact, the sparkle in the blue waters and the glistening surface of the wet rock was so moving and beautiful I thought, my goodness, I'm going to cry and the men in white coats are going to come for me right here in front of thousands of sunbathing strangers! How is it that we can miss the perfection around us? We set out each day to be entertained, occupied and exhilirated, either by the internet, athletic challenges or simple gossip. The ironic thing was the next day I received my Miracle Thought for the Day podcast from Marianne Williamson's blog and she too was marveling at the very same thing; the simplicity and beauty of a single blossom or chirping bird. Rediculous that we miss so much because we are in a hurry, late to somewhere important that we will forget about by next week. We need to take the time when there is so much activity around us and revel in life's presence, simplicity and sheer beauty. This stuff is free! We need to stop what we are doing and study the detail of the sights and sounds that are everywhere, take it in and realize how much life gives us if we just stop and take the time to notice. I really am finding myself doing just this every day. It might not be right away, might need a small reminder, but it is so rewarding. Make the effort once each day to note something small and wonderous. I encourage you to share these things with your children too, teach them to pause now. I'm thinking I may go moongazing tonight? Care to join me? Thanks for reading! Miriam

Create a Cairn this Summer

Build a Cairn in tribute. To a pet, to a loved one, to your country. Cairns have been seen throughout the world for centuries either built as a tribute in memorium or as a way to set a path for travelers hiking trails and mountains. They are today used as landmarks but are also used for astronomical purposes, although depending on their country of origin, have various meanings.

Cairns have been found from the Canadian Arctic to the United Kingdom. They can be simple towers of graduated stone or large, complex structures of many pebbles and rocks. They are a tribute to Hermes, the God of overland travel, according to Greek Mythology.

I love to search for cairns along the trails we hike in Sedona. Many of these are markers for a Vortex. Vortex are found along particular trails and are felt to have healing mystical powers. When we are hiking and come upon a Cairn I feel a part of something bigger than myself when I add my stone to the tower as we pass.

I felt so connected to these structures, and so moved by their aesthetic beauty that I have constructed two of my own in my backyard. I enjoy sitting on my porch and gazing at the flowerbed where I have a cairn built from rocks that each member of our family contributed to shape our Cairn.

The stone at the top is a very special contribution, it is the stone found on Long Bay, a picturesque beach in French St. Martin, on our honeymoon twenty years ago. I thought it a fitting symbolism of what we have built together, the five of us, starting and ending with a commitment made by two. Thanks for reading! Miriam