Conflict Resolution

Can I hear a big shout out for Springtime? I hate to keep ruminating over the weather but I'm really using my newfound meditation skills to envision blue skies, green grass and warm breezes. How 'bout you? In the meantime, until it's official arrival how about we work on some other projects needing attention? One such project calling my name is how the heck am I going to juggle the spring sports schedule successfully without making myself and others around me into whirling dervishes. Well, ok, so that probably isn't going to be possible, but I am going to try to at least get everyone where they need to be with the proper equipment and without getting a speeding ticket...maybe. Scheduling with three active boys is difficult; frantic at worst, chaotic at best. But that's the way it is. I do invest in an amazing calendar to keep our days decluttered to the minute. www.timemine.com creates the most well organized calendar I've found. It is presented in many sizes and styles to suit the various needs of different family structures. Check Borders, only place I can find it without online ordering. I go for the big kahuna and it works for me. Doesn't fit in my pocket or my handbag, for that matter, but it does keep us incredibly on track. Using multiple highlighters helps too. Each child is assigned a designation, whether it be an initial, a color, etc. As soon as I get my hands on the schedules I carefully enter practices and games; doublecheck then highlight accordingly. I prefer using initials myself so if I have to erase, I'm not leaving confusion in my wake with color designations applicable to none. I definitely use a specific warning color when there are conflicts that present issues; and there always are, especially when the weather dictates a rescheduling. This is when it can get really tricky and I usually have to engage a backup plan like a carpool. Of course, once the sports are entered into the calendar then we have all the other obligations that take place. CCD, music lessons, band practices, concerts, orthodontic appointments., etc. It's a finely tuned orchestration that is never set in stone but with good communication (thank goodness for my iphone!) and an up to date calendar (don't forget to immediately make changes as soon as you get the information!) then I think we can get through the next four months. Everyone in the household knows the routine and it works like a well oiled machine come late April, and thank goodness for that! At least I hope it will this year! Too many stumbling blocks to count but I will persevere. Talk to me in June and see how we did. Good luck to you too! Let the frenzy begin! Thanks for reading! Miriam

"Snowed" Again!

I'm sitting in my warm cozy home for the second weekend in a row having two additional feet of snow dumped upon us. This week the warm fuzzy feeling I had last week about being couped up and productive has been replaced with an uncertainty and a slight fear of what's to come. MORE, they say! Honestly, these events of nature give me pause and remind me that life isn't always controllable. Are we ready in case of an emergency at all times? Y2K kind of paralyzed us a bit. I tracked down the suggested emergency kit list, filled a huge Rubbermaid with all the recommended items the five of us could need for a 72 hr. period; fearing the time it would take our country to reclaim some balance when the entire computerized world we live in crashed at midnight, 1/1/00. Nothing happened... nothing momentous, anyway. But here we sit, again paralyzed as the East Coast has been dumped upon by mega amounts of snow, sleet, rain and the 50-60 mile an hour winds summoned to totally destroy any progress we made shoveling. Thinking of homes without power, major highways shut down, plow trains called in, emergency rooms and outpatient services at hospitals vacated, how do we prepare for a disaster should we be called to? I don't know if I have enough milk to get us through until Tuesday, when it is suggested that life will return to normal. For goodness sakes, how long will it take for all of this snow to melt? And God forbid a calamity occurs that no one is the least bit prepared for. I know, fatalistic. I'm a first born, a planner and a tad bit of a worrier. But really, are you ready for an occurrence that will take total control away from you? And how will you handle it? Visit www.ready.gov/america/getakit for a list of what you'd need in your home preparedness kit. You at least can now be a prepared scout! Trees are dropping on power lines and if someone were to need emergency care, could they get it? Just saying. Think about your plan, your family's plan and how you'd prepare and communicate your plan with your children. Back in the 40's there were air raids, in the 60's fallout shelters, in the 90's terror attacks. Are we preparing for the coming of the second ice age for goodness sakes? Global warming? I think not. But what? Just remember to be prepared. And P.S., it's snowing again Tuesday! Thanks for reading! Miriam

Inspiration of Blizzard Proportions!

Many people feel trapped or restricted when foul weather dictates their comings and goings. I, on the other hand feel liberated. Firstly, I can't believe how much snow is still coming down on top of what is already here. I guess that's why they call it a blizzard! Therefore, I'm taking full advantage. Luckily, I don't really have anything of major importance that can't be rescheduled. I feel liberated because it is forcing me to stay at my home and besides the cardio chore of shoveling, which will come later, I am invigorated by the length of my to-do list that keeps growing as the snow keeps piling. There are so many tasks that go undone at the house when we have full lives, either working full time outside the home or managing the schedules of our children. Basically, all this is put on hold for me and pretty much everywhere I look I can find a pretty good project to occupy my time. In Organize This, my Daily Local News column, I talked about organizing photos and how daunting that can be. Today with digital photography we many times take the photos but it doesn't go much farther than that; they are stuck on an SD card for perpetuity. I make sure I promptly load them to my computer, print out a hard copy and also create a CD version for storage. I think soon I will create an offsite account like Picasa for one more secure method of safe keeping, but not today. My list is calling. Use weekends such as we just had to really dedicate yourself to a few at-home tasks that you have been putting off. And I mean pick a doosie. The laundry can be done between runs to the gym and the store. Focus on something that has been nagging you for a while and get to it. Sometimes it can become a game or family affair if you get everyone else involved. Each family member can do something towards an end in one manner or another. This will surely speed the process and enable you to tackle a couple of these long lost chores while you wait to be shoveled out. Don't forget while you have your nose to the grindstone to glance out the window every so often to admire the beauty of nature. Don't let the negative thoughts of getting it moved out of the way or how you'll get to work tomorrow ruin the miracle of nature. There is nothing more spectacular than landscape covered with a fresh white snowfall. Just to give you some ideas of what I'm planning on accomplishing; I am going to cozy up to a fire and get caught up on my reading requirements for a class I'm taking. I'm going to read from start to finish for once, not chunks between pick ups and drop offs at guitar lessons. Laundry is on my to-do list because there is always laundry. I have a plethora of thank you notes to write, then there's my filing on my desk that is piled almost as high as the snow! If I get through this I have to practice my drums. Yes, I did say drums. Again, never too late to emulate Phil Collins. I feel this task will have a two-fold effect. The boys and the hubby will tire quickly of hearing me banging on the crash cymbals and possibly head outside and get the shoveling started. This could leave me some time to bake a few goodies for their hot cocoa break. Baking is something I never seem to have time for anymore. I'm feeling pretty good about my short list so far. Enjoy your progress this week! Thanks for reading! Miriam

Massaaahhhhhge Inspiration!

Can't de-stress if you're not stressed yet. So, here's a thought. If you add more stress to your life prior to a non-stressful event, will you appreciate it more? This is an experiment I was willed to participate in, apparently, although, not intentionally. Heading to NYC for a long weekend of fun and celebration with a bunch of friends, I decided that a visit to the spa would be just the ticket needed as an pre-weekend activity. Called, scheduled, simple. Well, little did I know I'd have to earn that massage. Being the fully engaged and tuned in person that I am aspiring to these days, I actually paid attention to the 6am traffic report and heard mention of an eighteen wheeler that toppled between here and my destination a short ten miles away. Perfect! NOT! I'll pick up my friend, Virginia who is joining me, head in the general direction then detour to the back roads and avoid the mess. Immediately upon entering the highway, traffic was already at a standstill. No problem, we'll just patiently inch our way up the highway...hey, are we moving or is that just the scenery?...I'll get off the next exit and cut through. What is this I see, a road block? The lovely, winding country roads are totally and completely jammed with clever people who have the same thought process as I do. But still, no worries, My Enclave has OnStar and I'm sure my little friend- in-a-box will save us since the "back" back roads; I can't negotiate on my own. Unfortunately, OnStar is two steps behind me instead of two steps ahead so that didn't work at all. Frustration mounts as our head start has been zapped to already tardy. Now, aren't we heading to a spa to relax and rejuvenate ourselves? Perfect, I'll get all notched up and unnerved and my massage therapist will earn her wages today. OnStar tried to reroute us but to no avail. Then I remembered...I have a friend who lives here in the hinterland and she'll bail me out, I know she will! Thank goodness Sue was home with a stomach bug (sorry Sue, but thanks!) Thirty minutes late to our destination and seeing stars from my bubbling blood pressure we were obviously turned away with a smile, but as luck would have it they were obligingly offering to flip-flop our day so we could lunch first, spa later. All was right again with our world and really, no worse for wear. Luckily the cafe was able to accommodate us early and lunch was ordered. The potato leek soup arrived steaming hot and piquant, anticipated greatly on this chilly January late morning. My friend, Virginia, reaches for her seasonings, a tad of pepper...a dash of salt....but wait...who forgot to tighten the salt shaker cap? Salt soup NOT on the menu! Can we please have a Depends to contain our "laughter"!!! If I don't get to that spa and force myself to relax I'm going to have a conniption! Luckily for us we picked a winner! What an amazing respite. Soothing sounds, luxurious linens and aromas to relax and revitalize, refresh and renew. I don't think I've enjoyed one spa service quite so much as today! Well earned. My advice; stress is never a good thing to have in your life but being able to laugh at it is. And sloughing it off (pun intended!) with a luxurious spa service doesn't hurt either! Thanks for reading! Miriam

Unexpected Inspiration

"Patience is a virtue, possess it if you can. Seldom in a woman, never in a man"! How many times did I hear this recited from the lips of my mother? I would be a wealthy woman if I were paid for listening time and again. I find myself instantly repeating this for my boys many times, but I give a condensed version as I don't want them to think I don't have patience myself! Which I do actually have...until I don't anymore. I guess, I probably am a wealthy woman from learning to incorporate this little verse into my daily life. Some times I'm richer for it than others, of course. Things happen that are beyond our control time and time again. We must be as prepared as we can for life's twists and turns. A few ways that we might be successful at this is to incorporate some type of life skill where we can step away from the situation and regroup. For some people it's a long walk or a run. For others it's an intense kickbox workout. For still others it's yoga or meditation. Even journaling can help provide clarity and an outlet for feelings that aren't easily processed at the moment when the stress seems insurmountable. Having other areas of your life decluttered and organized can give you the time you need to learn to practice patience and control. When life is chaotic and disorganized so are our responses to outside pressures that arise. I find when I am on time, have less demands on myself and have "all my ducks in a row" so to speak, I am more able to deal with a suddenly stressful situation more clearly and effectively. Think about when you were last flustered and ferklempt. Were you being pulled in too many directions, dealing with many issues at once and at your wits end with your patience? Didn't you step back later on and think, I could have certainly handled that much better, I know that was a reaction response that exhibited itself under stress. Get proper rest so you aren't dealing with stressors with sleep deprivation. Eat as healthfully as you can. Stay on top of your mail, your chores, your children's to-do list and settle up with things at days' end. Don't transfer more to the next days' to-do list than is reasonable. The patience will present itself when you need it if you enter into a problem feeling free and able to handle anything. Asking too much of yourself is asking for trouble. Thanks for reading! Miriam

Setting S.M.A.R.T. goals for '10.

Happy New Year to all! I took an extra week to regroup, hoping you don't mind. I figured I'd best practice what I preach, right? Remember way back early summer when I talked about assigning a weekly to-do task to my calendar each Monday, giving myself seven days to accomplish? Well, look below! The pantry was one of them! While it took me more like seven months instead of seven days, boy, do I feel great! And this is an important lesson to remind yourself, especially now, at this time, a new birth of another year when we are feeling so ready to tackle the world and all that awaits these next 365. Sometimes things happen in their own time, and that's ok too, just so it happens; and it did! I'm soooo happy with my clean pantry. So, thank you for allowing me a few extra days to get back to you, we all need extensions when we set deadlines that sometimes just aren't realistic. Well, seven months is not a realistic window for cleaning out a pantry so instead I like to think of it as a long term project! When you are setting good intentions this week for what you'd like to accomplish don't be too hard on yourself but definitely hold yourself accountable. This was actually our topic of discussion at this months Beyond The Bus Stop meeting; www.beyondthebusstop.com; setting goals and how we intend to follow through with them. How we allow ourselves to stumble, if we beat ourselves up when we fail and how we get back on the wagon and move forward with greater dedication to our goal. We must set our SMART* goals to stay focused on even the smallest tasks. We also must give ourselves permission to fail. Failure is not a sign of weakness but of strength. It shows that we are putting ourselves out there in the unknown and striving for something never before attained. Failure means we are attempting something new and that that route may not be the direction we should be focusing and that we need to try again with intention and energy. Find yourself a goal, it's not too late to set a New Years Resolution if you'd like to label your goal. Give yourself a start date and a completion date. But if you don't make it, don't fret. Implement an extension and rededicate yourself to your goal and go get it! Write and tell me what you've decided to accomplish in 2010 and how you intend to get there. Sharing knowledge is inspirational, even if it's a simple design for a re-organized pantry! * The SMART goal stands for S: specific, M: measurable, A: attainable, R: relevant and T: time-oriented. Thanks for reading! Miriam

Auld Lang Syne, My Friends!

"May Old Aquaintance Be Forgot...and never called to mind....." We know the tune, but at this juncture in the holiday season, we need to take some time to reconnect, rekindle and renew some old friendships or family connections needing nurturing. The year is closing and a new year is ahead. It seems like just yesterday that we whooped it up as we ushered in the year 2000! The first decade of the 21st century is behind us and we have so much to be grateful for. It's hard to believe how much has transpired over the past ten years and thinking about what is ahead in the next ten is mindboggling. To keep things in perspective, I am spending this holiday with friends and family that mean so much to me. I've cut down on the shoulds and oughta's and I am focusing on their wants and needs. I'm making a short list of goals for the coming year, and I'm keeping it simple so that I can be not only realistic but successful at reaching my goals. This is an excellent time to be making a to-do list for the coming decade. Can't fail here when we give ourselves an entire ten years to accomplish such a list! Of course, by doing this I don't mean to add undue pressure but having goals and maybe even a few dreams isn't so bad. In ten years my children will be grown and I will be an empty nester on a new journey. While my children are still home I am going to focus on nurturing our relationships. They are virtually new people, no longer small children but teens with their own identities, ideas and desires. I sometimes find it difficult to remember they rarely need my daily direction but moreso guidance and encouragement as they make their own decisions and choices. In a few years they will all be out of college and carving their own way which will leave me time to carve mine and I sometimes wonder what my life will be like. We don't have to leave it to chance, we can steer the course ourselves and I am looking forward to where the voyage into the next decade will lead. EDC Weekly Inspiration will be taking a vacation until after the new year to ponder this question, therefore, I will wish you now a wonderful holiday and a very Happy New Year! See you in 2010!

Ugg Luv!

Friends, I must confess...I'm a slave to my Uggs! I can't take them off! And I am like you, when I first laid eyes on them I thought to myself, these things are aptly named 'cause they are uggggly!!! I succumbed in private by investing in a pair called Coquette, the lug-soled slipper that gets me through my winter! I pop them on when I fumble out of bed in the morning and they are the first things I run to when I'm home again. Off and on they go day in and day out. I'm never too fatigued to unlace my tall boots for a spin in my uggs! Then I thought, well, do as the Romans' do...and I invested the following fall in a pair of the Classic mid-calf. I love how they look rolled down a bit. And let's face it, they aren't all that attractive but neither are my size 9 feet, so I figured when it comes to comfort, what's the dif? Last year I found myself trudging through New York City quite often in undesireable weather and not feeling urban chic enough for my liking. Ugg came to the rescue once again with a platform wedge style perfect with jeans and slacks, also fully lined with the fabulous shearling fur that keeps the tootsies so toastie on a Big Apple power shopping day. By this time my sons had caught onto my love for Uggs and bestowed me with not one but two pair of the sweet fuzzie thong style for Mom's day. I can now wear my Uggs twelve months a year...although you'll never catch me sportin' 'em with a mini or a swimsuit, sorry! My latest investment was a pair of black cardi's! So versatile with the buttoned up relaxed look, I wear them far too often; ask anyone! After 44 years of dancing on my worn out feet, arthritis strikes too often and comfort is my mantra many days. If you've been a holdout because of fear of following a trend, this trend is one worth succumbing to if you love to pamper your tootsies! Nordstrom carries a wide selection of styles and I'm certain you can find something to suit. They also offer occasional online sales, which is how I justified my cardi's...so keep your eyes open! Drop me an email and let me know if you invest in a pair or two, and tell me which you like best! I don't think I've completed by Uggs wardrobe just yet! Thanks for reading! Miriam

Holiday Uniform....make it simple and chic!

Let's move on here this week to some useful information, shall we? Putting together a sensational outfit for your holiday uniform. Did I say uniform? Yes, I did! I don't always abide by the uniform because I dress according to mood but generally have a small selection that I choose from for holiday set aside anyway. For some people a go-to uniform or two is just the ticket for the hectic schedules they keep with cocktail parties, dinners and holiday events throughout the next couple of months. Very economical too! The color palette these days is so easy to build a small wardrobe around using blacks and grays with pops of colors. Deep purples and plums are all the rage. So are bold colors such as fuchsia, royal blue and emerald greens. Metallics are still showing on the racks big time; silver, gold and copper in metallics, lames and satins! There's so much to chose from! Start with the simple backdrop of a black slack or skirt. Above the knee is a good place to begin with the skirt and grab a couple of pairs of opaques to go with. You can wear a pump, a bootie or a tall boot with this look. Top it with a color, either in a blouse, an embellished or floral ruffle sweater or tee and jacket. Layer strands and strands of beads, pearls and metals and you're good to go. If you need the comfort of a slack there are many cuts seen today. The straight or pencil cut is all the rage but if it's not within your comfort zone don't feel pressured. Anything goes, really. Once piece jumpsuits are back. Can you handle it? Satin, no less! Gorgeous for a holiday party and so chic and comfortable. If this isn't for you, stick with a slack and a terrific flowing white blouse with lots of bling. Scarves and wraps continue to be accent embellishments that add a distinctive look to something simple an do double duty for warmth. Peep toe pumps or a gorgeous satin strappy platform sandal will finish off any outfit and give it a dressy and hip look. There are sales and bargains galore out there. You can pick up some great pieces for less but don't scrimp on your shoes! Standing for a couple of hours in a poorly constructed pair of pumps can do more damage than good if they are killing your feet! When my feet hurt, everything hurts, so shop with longevity in mind with the trendy shoes and don't go over the top trendy, that way you can get more wear per buck and not feel the guilt. Again, strands of pearls, chains and colored stones of all shapes and sizes go. If you're bold pile it on! Make sure you stand in a full length mirror when you dress so you know the balance is right. Even petite women can pull of this look if done right. Add pieces then take off a couple and see what balances your frame the best. Top it all off with a metallic clutch and a stunning black wrap secured with a broach and you've got a uniform! Simple go-to pieces to get you through the next six weeks or so right into the new year. Enjoy the festivities feeling great! Cheers...and thanks for reading! Miriam

Rain, Rain, Go Away....I've personally had enough, if anyone cares!

Rain, Rain, Go Away....and I don't really care if it comes back another day!!! I can't believe how much precipitation has been dumped on our heads this past month! It was a pretty soggy summer too but come on now?! Rain is good. We all know the benefits of what a good soaking can do, and I truly doubt we'll be in a drought situation next spring because our reservoirs have got to be brimming over like an unattended baby pool! I'm just saying, the wet dog, the muddy feet, the frizzy do! I can't take it anymore. I have been hoping for snow...which I really can't seem to tolerate more than a dusting of as of late...just so it's less messy to get around. Too many fall sporting games have been cancelled to ever try to reschedule. I can't remember the last time I washed my car! I mean, ya know, with real soap and all. Grungy liquid from the polluted sky has had to suffice. The only benefit I can see is that I did manage to get a few extra winter chores accomplished at home that I usually wouldn't have tackled until later in the year. My holiday cards are ordered, the kids playroom is sorted and organized and so is my cedar closet. Don't look in my back yard because fall cleanup has yet to be completed although I could probably pull an entire shrub out with my bare hands, the soil is so soft and pliable. My children have benefited a little from the foul weather. Less play outdoors and more time dedicated to studying and reading. What else is there for them to do? When you can get your kids to voluntarily study? Then let it rain! While it does have it's drawbacks, I'll try to remember that after the the rain comes the sun and along with it, renewal. Springtime rains bring new growth, fragrant blossoms and perfect beauty so I'll try not to complain too much. At the pace this fall is going spring is just moments away. However, for now, look indoors and find a couple of things you can chalk off your to-do list! I don't think we've seen the last of it yet! Thanks for reading! Miriam